yay!!!

so i just found out i got chosen to perform next wednesday!!! i am soo excited and nervous! eek

wish me luck

ok so i submitted myself for the 'wannabe wicked' contest that is going on here at the universal studios city walk. you can view my epk press kit here:

View Lauren Stanley's EPK


within the next week i will know if i made it as a semi-finalist and from then I will go to the city walk sing my song and hope that i get chosen as a finalist. after that they will put up everyones submission video and you will be able to vote for whom you think should win the contest!

the winner will receive a one time opportunity to be in the show at the pantages for one night only. i am very excited at this opportunity folks. you never know what could happen.

attention vegetarians/vegans

the above is the most genius, delicious absolutely satisfying frozen vegan meal yet. i put these in the microwave or in the oven with aluminum foil for a few minutes along with some brown rice or steamed vegetables and i am completely happy. serve these to your animal eating friends and they will be shocked at how tasty they are.

now don't expect them to literally look and taste like an animal's ribcage. after all it's not a dead carcass that has been rotting or bleeding dry. but it is however good for those people that like the taste of meat but hate the idea of killing an innocent life or not too self consumed to care.

p.s davey and i are speaking about having a total cruelty free wedding. i don't want to enjoy the big day and then wonder how many innocent animals were killed on behalf of us.

antiquing

this sunday my whole family is going to the antique swap meet in irvine. it is so much fun even if i don't buy anything i always enjoy myself. davey and i just purchased this really cute antique shelf for 20 bucks at chicago antiques this weekend and I had a vision of spray painting it cherry red after looking at emily's shelf which i of course love, what isn't there to love when it is made by her:


currently the little shelf is black, but i would like to see a little bit more color in our green room.

this is what you get when you marry a british man

Thanks to davey you can enjoy the following clip:

feifel goes west

yesterday I was walking out of a parking structure when I noticed a little mouse by the steps where a lot of foot traffic happens. I thought when I walked near the mouse he would for sure run as fast as he could, but instead of running I noticed he was shaking a little bit and had a broken leg. I panicked and was uncertain about what to do as I had nothing on me but my purse and I honestly debated whether or not I should put the mouse in my purse and take him to the nearest pet hospital.

As I got closer to the mouse, I reached my hand out to pet him and was relieved when I noticed he calmed down a bit. After a few minutes of speaking softly to him and trying to maneuver him closer to a bush I got the courage to pick him up. As I picked him up i looked closely to his little face and I could tell he was scared. As I started to move him into the bush a woman saw that I had him in my hand and started screaming. I mean really going for it screaming.

Now, this woman was about 230 lbs 5'10 and clearly much larger than this little mouse but nonetheless her scream was strong enough to scare the little guy and upon his fear of her scream he bit me. I was completely shocked at this bite that my hands without thinking shook him out of my hands and he fell to the floor.

When his little body hit the ground I could hear his little squeak and he seemed to appear dead. I immediately started to cry and I called davey. The mouse remained on the floor for a couple of minutes and I thought for certain I had killed this little baby. I finally saw a bit of life in him and decided I would try to pick him up with a napkin. I know this sounds quite stupid as I should have got a box or a bag, but I was thinking fast and was afraid that someone would certainly step on him or release their dogs on him.

The worst was yet to come as this monster of a man asked me if it was my mouse...

I know right, who brings their mouse to an oudoor mall only to allow it loose around a full parking structure with cars zooming past. when i told the man that the mouse was injured and that he was wild he said i should kill it, or drown it. I was totally repulsed with this beast of a man and refused to leave the mouse now at this point even with the bite starting to bleed on my hand.

When I noticed one of the workers in the mall I called upon her as I was hoping she could get me a small box or bag to put him in. My hope ceased when I realized that this woman did not speak a word of english. The man called upon her to dust the mouse into her dust pan. I watched her do it and I looked at her and begged her not to kill him. The man said 'are you crazy? that mouse needs to be killed! all of these kids and dogs around...get rid of that filth.'

the fact that this man could look at this mouse which by now at this point had very little to no bite left literally, inside this little dust pan was just repulsive to me. the human race has more monsters than i once thought. i again looked at the mouse which now was looking up inside the dust pan to the mall worker with such fear in his eyes actually broke my heart.

what was meant to be a rescue mission has now turned terribly wrong and I am all to blame. I again looked at the woman and asked her to please put the mouse in the bushes and asked her to please not kill him. she shook her head in a way that at least i hope meant she wouldn't kill him, but i suppose i will never know. after the whole incident happened, i called my mom crying hysterically and was then told how stupid i am and how this 'animal rights' crap has gone too far. 'first it was not eating meat, then it was telling us all how sick we are for eating meat, and now this?'

i realized how foolish it is to pick up a wild rodent but that is just me i guess. i would do anything to stop animals from being killed regardless of what kind of animal they are. after my call to my mom i was urged to go to the hospital in which they treated my mouse bite with some bandages and a tetnus shot. thank god i didn't have to get a rabies shot, it turns out wild california mice do not carry rabies.

i can't get the image out of my head of that little mouse. i wish i could have taken him home with me. he was a little butter ball, a little baby...

upset stomach, waiting in lines, and running into old friends

davey and i just got home from the movies. i know friday night at the movies are a cliche but hey, when you only get one day off a week to go it's the only way. so first things first, mamma mia or dark knight? davey was assuming i wanted to see mamma mia first so when i decided to watch dark knight first i could see his excitement really go into overload. we get to the movies and quite frankly i wanted to leave right away because the lines were nothing short of chaotic.

children left and right, cougars in bebe sweat outfits, persians smoking cigarettes next to their children's strollers, high school gangsters, couples setting up shop in line with chairs stolen from the food court and their 'to go' sushi, families with wetzel pretzels, and davey and i.

i'll spare the spoilers and anything else that might be somewhat interesting and just stick to the point. dark knight is truly all it's cracked up to be.

heath ledger is all he's cracked up to be. and Gary Oldman.....well we love you.

because of the time crunch we didn't end up eating dinner but rather a meal of popcorn, sour patch kids and of course diet coke. a bit ironic but whatever works. we ate loads, i felt sick....had to pee about half way in but could not bare to get up and miss anything. this movie is that fast that if you are gone for five minutes you could miss everything.

afterwards davey and i did a mad dash to the toilet running past anything that didn't get their bum up within the first ending credit, we shuffled past a few of the old folks, and even a few of the young ones until we finally reached our destination toilet.

after one of the longest pees of my life, we walked out of the cinema only to run into my friend brinn that up until today hadn't seen in months. that was lovely. anyway now that i feel truly beast like i am going to get my big one to bed.

wahhh

petfinder breaks my heart:

adopt these babies together! please!!!!!!!!! They were found in a basket together clinging on to one another for comfort and survival. if davey and i didn't have the beauts you'd bet we would have both of these loves.





http://www.petfinder.com/petnote/displaypet.cgi?petid=11384729
http://www.petfinder.com/petnote/displaypet.cgi?petid=11384645

comfort lyrics

drink up, baby, stay up all night
the things you could do, you won't but you might
the potential you'll be, that you'll never see
the promises you'll only make

drink up with me now and forget all about the pressure of days
do what I say and I'll make you okay and drive them away
the images stuck in your head

people you've been before that you don't want around anymore
that push and shove and won't bend to your will
I'll keep them still

drink up, baby, look at the stars
I'll kiss you again between the bars where I'm seeing you
there with your hands in the air, waiting to finally be caught

drink up one more time and I'll make you mine
keep you apart deep in my heart separate from the rest
where I like you the best and keep the things you forgot

the people you've been before that you don't want around anymore
that push and shove and won't bend to your will
I'll keep them still

voicemails like dimitri

today while i was napping amanda left me a voicemail which i did not receive until now. it was so funny to me i had to post it as a video. forgive me for not knowing how to use my imovie to simply record sound:



here is a voicemail that is really awesome, i also wouldn't know about 'dimitri the stud' without amanda's myspace bulletins, but after watching this video you will be thrilled that i did.

estelle getty

today one of my favorite women in the world passed away. Estelle Getty who is best known for her role as Sophia Petrillo on 'The Golden Girls' passed away in Los Angeles around 5:30 am. I have had a very strong connection with Estelle for several years because of the fact that she reminded me so much of my nana Jimmie. When my nana passed away back in 2002 I clung close to my golden girls dvds as a reminder of my nana. Inevitably I began to watch the women to comfort my loss as well as make me feel happy.

Estelle was a woman that was so funny and delivered such a funny character in every performance it was difficult to not be charmed by her. I will miss knowing that someone like her existed in the world. She was one of a kind. I will keep Estelle's family and friends in my thoughts. Rest in Peace Estelle we love you!

so cute!

here's a video of kate, carly, sam and alana in vegas, they went to see coldplay this weekend. their video is so cute! relocated- Coldplay Viva La Vegas

where the hell is matt?

this video is pure genius, and really inspiring. talk about feeding the travel obsession

dinner, spins, wedding stuff.

last night davey and i went to dinner with nils. after dinner we went to get coffee and i seemed to be completely wired afterwards and had the spins. i went home asap and davey and nils proceeded to go out to visit joel at his new bar. all i have to say is peets coffee is the pits. and i will never go there again! i thought diedrichs was strong coffee? all day today i felt like crap. when i was dropping davey off at church today, i had another eyegraine. i even went into work for a little bit today and even then i couldn't wait to get out of there. we ended up going to dinner tonight with my mom, that was nice. it has been a while since i have gone out to dinner with my parents. My dad passed as he thinks pei wei is for the birds. i had the tofu and vegetable blazing noodles, however i don't think they were quite blazin' enough. after dinner i looked over a few different wedding photographers that caught my eye. i really like Jack Randall's photography and Kusha Alagband's wedding portfolio is to die for. My mom is so cute, today she bought the new vogue because of the dress kate moss is wearing on the cover inspired her for her dress that she wants to wear to the wedding. Davey wants beards to be the ring bearer although i think it will be stiff competition with little zachariah as our other choice (my first choice). As far as dates we are looking either in the end of august/september of 2009. Although depending on how we can get David's family all out here at once, it may require some more time, and if that is the case we will push it back to 2010 as to not have the wedding too close to the holidays. We will be sending out invitations very soon to our engagement party, which i am very excited about, this next year is going to go by so quickly and I know i will be a busy bee as I do not want a wedding planner.

i need a new macbook(pro)

because i keep adding more and more files of photos and videos, i need the macbook pro! i can't help it i have become obsessed! today everyone celebrated julie's birthday at my parents house. while everyone was outside in the backyard playing lawn tennis, zachariah and i made movies, here is one of them!

eden's last

many of my friends know my obsession with the musical wicked, in fact many of my friends even know my obsession with specific actresses that have played my dream role elphaba. amongst my favorite elphabas i would probably say that eden espinoza is my favorite. she was la's elphaba here at the pantages, and she brought tears to my eyes everytime i heard her sing defying gravity specifically the way she styles the song to match her voice. here is a video of eden's last performance as elphaba, she is magical.

hit me on my burner prepaid wireless

this song gets stuck in my head!! it also reminds me of last christmas loads! i hate songs like this really, but somehow really like this one now. i especially like that she is a 'bonafied hustler' who makes sandwiches.

as z baby would say 'rotonius piggy'

zachariah and davey always talk about the notorious piggy, and to be the notorious piggy is the equivalent of being the bollox. i think its funny how the two of them interact together.

right where it belongs

i remember when i was in high school, i had a nine inch nails sticker on the back of my car that i was so proud of. it was one of the first edition nin stickers that came to print and i remember thinking that everyone would know how truly awesome i was for having it. i used to drive around with different friends in my car playing certain parts of songs for them and telling them how it made me feel, or how it inspired me. i'm pretty sure nine inch nails is the only band that i can honestly say is my band. that is to say no one showed them to me, i wasn't given a burnt cd with a few of their hits on it, i didn't start listening to them because i thought it would make me cool, it was just the first band that made me feel alive. as cheesy and as nuts as that may sound to you, its as meaningful and serious as anything that i could say about any music. i am sure i drove everyone nuts with all of my over analyzing and sensitive nature to their music. i remember listening to the fragile all senior year of high school, and upon graduation i went to see them play at the then anaheim pond, now called the honda center. a perfect circle opened for them, and i remember thinking it was the best night of my life. eight years later, i still think it is up there as one of the best nights of my life. up until late i haven't been listening to nine inch nails very much because i have been listening to lou reed, nick cave, elliott smith and pj harvey for the past two years. i am kind of like that you see. i go through phases usually only listen to a few bands/artists over and over for a couple of years and then change it up to suit my life. it was a mistake a couple nights ago that this even happened. davey made a playlist on my itunes and it had the acoustic version of right where it belongs on it. i was on my own listening to it, and i felt like i was 17 again. all the emotion came back, and i felt something. it's weird for me to feel anything these days as i am very emotionally jaded, but at that moment i felt like i used to, and it felt great.

at long last

after three years of not driving in the U.S with the exception of the occasional drive in the old saturn before i got rid of it, davey has had absolutely no driving experience here what so ever. with that said at first it was absolutely terrifying to get in the car with him. Disneyland's autopia is no different than the wild roads of the 405 when you have davey in the drivers seat. see attached video:

none of my fears are as dear to me

while shopping on etsy i listened to one of my favorite bands of the past three years, the veils. The lead singer in this video reminds me of my friend nils, and this song is my favorite song of theirs, although i prefer the album version more.

save them!

i haven't eaten meat since i was 15. i wish i never had. it makes me absolutely sick to think that we are monsters to these animals. that our own human desire seems to be 'important' enough to butcher these innocent animals. stop being selfish, stop being greedy horders. get over your needs, and think about something other than yourself.

christian the lion

nils sent this to davey last night, i thought it was really cute. i got a bit teary eyed.

gymnopedie

i don't know why but every time i listen to gymnopedie my heart wanders off somewhere else. i instantly see davey and i walking through lax hopping on a plane to somewhere far away. probably the uk, but nonetheless somewhere adventurous and new. emile pandolfi's version is probably one of my favorite versions of gymnopedie because it isn't too fast and its not too slow to where you feel like you are in a saturn car commercial. in fact i think it was saturn that used gymnopedie in one of their commercials back when they were doing the whole "wave goodbye to childhood" commercials. anyway, i have this study mix/gym mix they are the same thing and its filled with all of my favorite songs, and i have three versions of gymnopedie on there, mixed with some chopin. i got inspired last season of dexter when deb was on the treadmill running to chopin so i figured i would try it out and it is really good for just letting your mind wander off while you are running. Pascal Roge is also really good, my favorite song of his would be his version of Ravel's 'Pavane pour une infante defunte.' i could listen to that song for hours. also gives me the travelling vibe, although with Roge's piano works I always imagine myself already on the plane getting ready to land somewhere as opposed to waiting to get on.

anyway here is a short video of Pavane Pour une Infante Defunte, hopefully one day I will be able to play like this:

the other man in my life

blake incarcerated

So, EVERYONE knows my obsession with amy winehouse is not anything new, i mean just one look at the wino and its painfully obvious to know why i love this train wreck/glorious maybe even flawless human being. today i like amy for her dedication to her blake... see following:



for a closer look:




perhaps its the mood/vibe im in but i think this is so cute. the end

goodbye youth...and goodbye single life

i'm engaged.

oh gentle soul of mine....

i can't wait to meet you one day

baby, you make life so much better...

gym....

so best time now for three miles is 40 minutes and 8 seconds. today i felt the worst. i was red in the face for about a half hour afterwards. i will celebrate by enjoying a good dinner, a popsicle, watch a few episodes of frasier and a game of chess with davey. tomorrow davey and i get to pick up zachariah from school and go get some lunch and go swimming in the pool. god i love my nephew so much! check him out:

come over here babe it ain't that bad.

i don't claim to understand the troubles that you've had...

today is a weird day. i woke up at around 7:45 this morning after having several nightmares. the first nightmare i can remember is one that involved me walking into the bathroom and finding a man standing in the corner that looked an awful lot like james spader which coincidentely looks a lot like my brother and spader was looking at me very strangely, i noticed he was standing in front of a shaky door that seemed to have some kind of animal behind it, perhaps a wolf or a dog...i don't really remember. but i stupidly disregarded the red flags to get out of the bathroom, i proceeded to go into one of the stalls. once i was in i heard a lot of barking and painful noises coming out of the animal. i then could establish the man screaming at the animal was my brother. i immediately got out of the bathroom to save the animal, but my brother was trying to explain that the animal was there to kill me. upon realizing this i thought my brother was going to kil the animal so i disregarded the fact that the animal might want to kill me, and proceded to pick up the dog/wolf and run as fast as i can. on my way out of the bathroom i was running down a hallway filled with monsters and sick people. they were all screaming at me and trying to scare me by either groping me or making statements about my past. it was really terrifying and i woke up just briefly after that and clung on to davey for dear life. he was in a dreamlike state probably dreaming of ice cream and cheesecake and i woke him up with news of my bad dreams. he fell asleep shortly after hugging me and i got up and began reading some more of the "soul making" theodicy.

even after being up and reading, i still felt like i was in a funk, and that the dream was still with me, so i turned on lifetime and watched the golden girls. always makes things seem like they ain't that bad.

amanda!

i just got your text message and i miss you too! in fact i just went on your youtube and watched this:


for those of you that don't know my friend amanda because she's an east coast gal and i never see her, she is on the right. message amanda and tell her not to move to paris!

with all the vlogging...

here's a change for you....

piggy!

for those of you that eat pigs, you make me sick. honestly, go kick rocks, and for those of you that get off on posting videos of pigs being killed by other animals, and pigs being hunted you are truly the lowest of the low. you're perverse and disguisting.

with all the patriotism

here are some women that make me very proud to be an american.

somebody please...

get me one of these...

i know i'm asking a lot considering Royale and Christina just sent me flowers a few weeks ago, but i mean this is on a whole other level!!

check out the hello kitty pineapple

news from polly

this gravestone is no more. after going to macclesfield two years ago, i am very happy to say that i was able to visit before some idiot decided to add up all of their goth points and steal something that clearly did not belong to them. just like you polly, this news was very sad to me as well.
Ian Curtis' Gravestone Stolen

Sad news of a slightly different sort coming out of the Joy Division fold: The BBC reports that the gravestone marking the grave of Ian Curtis, the late frontman for the legendary mope-rockers, has been stolen.
According to the BBC, at some point between Tuesday afternoon and Wednesday morning, thieves removed the stone from its perch at the Macclesfield Cemetery in Curtis' hometown of Macclesfield, England. Authorities currently have no leads as to the whereabouts of the stone, which bears the inscriptions "Ian Curtis 18 - 5 - 80" and "Love Will Tear Us Apart".

tasty travels just like rachel ray

from her to eternity

The grass here grows long and high
Twists right up to the sky
White clouds roll on by
Come on now and help me babe

happy birthday leibniz

at least that was the theme of today! tempting cupcakes were the pits, but alas i gave mine to davey instead. so, the 5k training is going well. I know to some of you this may not seem like much of an accomplishment, but I did three miles on the treadmill in under 42 minutes. I am just trying to slowly get my time down. My goal will be to run three miles in 36 minutes. I can't believe that it is so hard to do. I mean i really thought that after the first mile my heart was going to explode. Davey and I were running side by side, and there was this really disgusting smell blowing along my way, and i could have sworn it was davey as i threw him a look, but alas it was the man on the other side of him who literally smelled like raw sewage... or as i would probably explain to christina.. it was full on raw dog.

in other news, i have a huge spider bite on my thigh. i mean huge. davey tells me that it is my karma for not letting him kill the spiders that are in our room. i just can't bare the thought of it really. it's quite ironic though that the spider would choose me to bite rather than davey's ass.